he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
What the fuck I just showed up to court still drunk and the judge told me I smelled like his wife
then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
Oh my god I peed in a park last night and then tried to set off fireworks with a group of middle-aged men
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
Fun times on public transportation. I just had a guy imply that I was racist cause I didn't want to talk to him when I was clearly reading my book and he was clearly on coke.
I dont have to work tomorrow im yelling gibberish at squirrels
I was standing in my mom's kitchen in only my neon green thong, eating pizza over the garbage can, and sobbing while he was yelling at me.
Gonna be late for work. Sex comes first. Priorities.
My vape juice got mixed up with the astroglide.
Wow..I bet that tasted bad.
Not tasted.
Randomize
