Fuck him tonight for the both of us. We're still tag-teaming in spirit.
i'm reaslly not drunk enough to wtch the fat lesbian on my floor brng another fat lesbian dressed up as a bloody nurse into her room at 2am
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
If I squint, he looks like Jude Law. But that's kind of a weird face to make during sex.
I'm tired of stuffing my fat into a slutty costume. Next year let's go as homeless girls. Cute ones. In leggings with camel toe.
If we ever start off with margaritas for breakfast and end up naked covered in olive oil...I could think of worse ways to spend a day.
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
Pretty sure I'm about to get another tattoo. It'll have mom in there somewhere for Mother's Day.
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
I am all the way hung over and want nothing more in this world than a McMuffin. Happy day after Thanksgiving.
His dick is a skeleton key. It fits everywhere.
Should I apologize for the loud sex I had in his living room? Because I'm not going to.
Definitely not.
He was shirtless in my yard saying he was jesus
I woke up handcuffed to a bed wearing nothing but an army belt. Does this count as thanking our country?
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