I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
I bought beer tonight and got 3 coupons with my receipt. Paper towels, laundry detergent, and Advil. I wonder if Stop & Shop predicts the future or just does this with every beer purchase.
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
Can't show you right now as we are in public and he refuses to let me photograph his penis in a bar.
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
I'm convinced that college is the only place where one can have an existential crisis over what sweatpants to wear
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
I HAVE A BLACK EYE FROM A DILDO!! IM GETTING MARRIED TOMORROW! THIS IS NOT A MISSUNDERSTANDING!
Ok I am NOT pregnant. I could shove coal up my vagina and my uterus would turn it into a diamond in a matter of minutes
A black suburban rolled up and a scary suited guy got out the passenger side and opened the door for her as she got in. Then drive off. Who did I just fuck?
Just fat and dog and sweat all over the bed. All night long.
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
Where are you and why are you fighting with a bird?
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
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