I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
glow-in-the-dark stars on his ceiling from '98 totally make blowing him more romantic.
only 75% of american men are circumcised...i guess this was bound to happen to me someday.
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
He just kept telling me how to do certain things. It was like I was fucking my sex ed teacher
Just heard the girl at the bar cuss her bf out and order a long island ice tea. Going to give it 5 min then I'm going in. See you on the other side.
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
Serious question: when you had my right nipple in your mouth, did my nipple ring have both of the balls on it, or was it missing one. Current situation: missing one.
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
Here you are just trying to masturbate and I'm talking to you like your an initiate for some secret society.
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
I'm only bisexual one week out of the month. Nothing like ovulation hormones to make the genders of my hookups seem completely irrelevant.
Thank god I work in a lab. This pinkeye is out of control and my safety glasses are the only thing stopping me from digging at my eye with a pen
Chasing down vodka with apple juice and crying. Alone.
Randomize
