My bra smells like weed because there's weed in my bra
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
i can't remember the last friday i didn't spend in the foetal position
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
Tried to eat a sandwich this morning. Couldn't. My jaw is locked up. These marathon blow jobs are killing me
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
You, me, naked, mistletoe, fifth of jack, gallon of lube, condoms, Cheetos, handcuffs, rope, along with no morals, inhibition or judgment. That's all I want for Christmas.
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
Not all of us can be into hot dads. Some of us have to have commitment issues and be into musicians.
hey man , the girl you brought home last night is in the kitchen puking in the sink and asking if she can have more shots of Whiskey....think i should give her a shot glass or send her home....
I swear it’s like he’s filling my soul via my vagina
I'd rather plunge my eyes out than acknowledge being related to either of my brothers
Randomize
