Dude, I woke up in the middle of the night and your room mate was just standing there at the foot of the bed, watching us sleep.. you don't remember me shaking the shit out of you to tell you this?!
This could explain the reason why I've been finding his clothing and keys scattered in random parts of my room..
AND THIS DOESN'T WORRY YOU?!
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
You act like pregaming preseason hockey is a crime. Come on man, get fucked up and watch pucks. It rhymes so well it has to go together. DOS EQUIS Y DEVILS!
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
You don't know how badly I want to just hold you as a soup spoon holds a bisque
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
I woke up in my tom cruise outfit with my house key tied to my thong....
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
SOME DUDE PUT OUT FOR A MCCHICKEN AND YET YOU STILL WON'T FUCK ME
You're going to replace me with a robot made of heating blankets and a vibrator?
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
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