A girl just told me I should smile because I was surrounded by hot girls. I told her that clearly beauty was in the eye of the beholder. And she slapped me!
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
Yeah, my mom walked in on us. Instead of yelling, she went and hid in the bathroom til we finished. It was pretty classy.
So the coke mirror was perfectly angeled at my face right when i woke up this morning. I now know how I'd look on intervention.
Im shirtless eating a burrito. How urgent is this?
Hey, no judgement here...this is the girl that threw up on a box of kittens at the magician's house
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
I don't know how I'm going to know it's her, I only know what she looks like with a wig on
SHE COULD ALREADY BE HERE AND I WOULDN'T EVEN KNOW
I don't know if I should feel proud or ashamed of myself...ashamed for making myself a drink at 6:15am or proud for actually being awake that early.
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
Do you think he’ll fall in love with me if I tell him I have a nickname for his penis
outside on the street drinkin, walked into a random house and asked to pee, some kid hands me a beer and says i have to chug it first
Randomize
