I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
I had sex with him, and then he gave me a $5 Starbucks gift card. Totally worth it
rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
i had to cut you off after you shoved a bunch of bottle caps in your mouth and pretended you had braces.
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
You know just a typical night. Eating peanut butter off of tablespoons and having sex to our favorite Christmas carols. This is my favorite time of year.
Do you ever get high and look at your cat and feel like you know them on an intellectual level?
Just had to stop myself from doing a bump on the Disney bus. The struggle is real.
What kind of paramedic is he, some dude is dying back there and he's trying to get laid
He's literally cuddling with the washer and dryer.
Granted every 20 shifts of working there you seem to be on par to receive some sort of racy satisfying sexual encounter which money can’t buy
Randomize
