i hope my daughter doesn't end up with cankles. no guy likes cankles.
Segways are the fanny packs of transportation. Useful in some situations, but you always look like a tool when using one.
Even if he doesn't call, at least I can say i fucked a mascot.
I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
I vaguely remember having a 'grass is greener' conversation about our nipples. Dream or beautiful reality?
Beautiful, beautiful reality
We are both federal employees and Obama gave us a four-day weekend to lie in bed. Do you know how many orgasms that will be? I knew there was a reason I voted for this guy.
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
I solemnly swear I will not get your boyfriend puke in public drunk again
i saw way too much penis for that to have been a funeral
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
I may be a feminist, but I am not above using my body to distract you if it means I might beat you in a game of scrabble.
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
