who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
This could help me cancel out guys. First 4 that text me get to stay in the loop. And the last one gets the boot. We'll do this til there's only one man standing
Don't bother coming over to clean the mess. I already paid two kids 5 bucks for it, just didn't tell them you peed all over the place. You do owe me 5 bucks though
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
I have got to stop making out with redheads. I need to sign my life over to my dad like Britney Spears.
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
I'm about to initiate a game of drunk UNO.
Drunk UNO has officially been banned from now until forever.
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
Can I just keep holy water in the night stand next to the vibrator?
Please don't explain what tea bagging is to my mother.
JUST BECAUSE I ANSWER THE DOOR NAKED CARRYING A BOTTLE OF RUM DOESN'T MEAN YOU CAN STARE NEIGHBORS.
Randomize
