Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
In the airport and just saw a little boy put his head in his mother's crotch... I guess he took a whiff because he backed up and said loudly, "mommy your pee-pee is stinky!"
I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
can we please take bets on how much therapy you'll need in the future?
Too high to move please buy hi-c and pour it in my mouth in exchange I will marry your first born child
if the furniture in my bedroom wasn't shape shifting... this would be a different story.
Dude did I even see you at the bar. Cause I was for sure there then the next second apparently I was crying next to my Christmas tree because nobody believed in me.
my throat is bruised, my back is scarred, my vagina feels like it's going to fall off.. you're like godzilla. you destroy everything.
I learned a very valuable lesson tonight...don't touch a cops tazer
I told him I had an IUD and he asked me how was a bomb a form of birth control..
if you want to know how my night is going I just ugly cried in the cheesecake factory
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
My friends got engaged today and I learned the techniques of going upside down on a stripper pole. I'm not really sure who won...
This couple is walking their pig around campus
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