I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
T-minus about 54 seconds until I am too high to speak English.
I'm jealous
My throat feels like a candle.
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
the girl next to me in class is drinking a margarita out of a slurpee cup. i know your going to ask how i know its a margarita and the answer is i can smell the tequila. i never want to leave this place
I'm terrified to sleep next to her. Of course the sex will be fuckng awesome.
you will always have a special place in my vag
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
It is a sign that I need a fresh start when Kelly Clarksons new album tells the story of my life.
I honestly think she should have her own reality show called "Lowering the Bar" and it consists of a camera crew following her from Bar to bar hooking up with unsuspecting drunk attractive men.
He called yelling about whhhhhhiskey and enchiladas I heard sirens in the background last time I talked to him b
When's the best time to point out that all of my orgasms this year have been self-administered? Valentine's day?
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
Hey man, he's too drunk to remember what you said. What drugs are we buying and when should we expect them?
Randomize
