and by charming I mean he has a horse cock.
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
I puked in the revolving door and had to sit down on the escalator. That hungover. It's safe to say people are judging me.
Not going out tonight. And so the 25 day drinking streak ends....
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
Hey, it was your idea to keep her occupied with the barscanner on your phone.
you didnt need to give her a fucking sharpie. there are handmade barcodes everywhere. including my cock. fucker.
We met a guy named Raymond. You called him ramen all might and told him you would eat him up, "like sex, on a budget."
Just try not to burn your pubes off with sparklers this year.
No promises
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
So help me God.... if he sends me a dick pic.... I will make it so he has to eat food through a tube in his nose and poop into a bag by his belly button
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
i was so proud for not passing out at the same time as usual. i screamed that i had a "new personal best!" then some jackass explained daylight savings.
I had to cum in my sink.
you should come have a drink with me (non alcoholic or otherwise) im at the same bar as your sister and a few guys that would apparently "lick your butthole"-congratulations
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