It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
OMG! Someone dumped chocolate soft-serve in the bathroom! Dibs!
The worst mistakes make the best memories. Write that down.
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
I'm more impressed with the spaghetti smoothie at the present moment.
im just going to wait until i dont feel like the grim reaper is having sex with me
You were throwing ham at people telling them you were the sandwhich fairy
you wouldn't believe how quickly birth control dissolves in vodka
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
I would lick a homeless mans crack teeth for a cup of coffee right now.
tried to make it look like I had been conscious/awake and out all day when I stumbled into cvs at 6pm to buy plan B
update: I failed
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
THERE IS JIZZ ON MY CEILING. HOW THE FUCK IS THERE JIZZ ON MY CEILING
THREE MINUTES! THREE MINUTES PAST MIDNIGHT I STSRT HEARING CHRISTMAS MUSIC ON THE OVERHEAD PA SYSTEM!!!
Randomize
