i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
This is me reassuring you that I'm still alive and making sure you still are.
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
I swear the pregnant cashier was jealous when I bought my plan B
Apparently you can talk a girl into leaving the bar and coming back to your tent, who knew?
I don't think eating half of a pickle out of my mouth counts as getting to know me
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
Apparently I've been blackout drunk doing abstract algebra on the floor
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
Considering how much money I just spent on slutty lingerie, it is totally appropriate for me to be plucking my nipple hair right now. Right?
I'm so high that I'm intently watching my neighbor move his car back and forth in order to put his motorcycle in the garage, and getting irritated that it seems so complicated.
The appetizer at the dinner I went to tonight was Klonopin and a Bloody Mary.
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
Randomize
