My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
You threw a bottle at the bartender and then stole his tip jar. However, you were quickly KO'd by the bartender. Solid right hook.
I still have your handprint on my ass. You're not allowed to ignore me yet.
i just got cockblocked by a guy drinking wine straight out of the bottle with a straw...
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
He looks like Ryan Reynolds from this angle
Since when is drunk an angle?
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
How many vodka infused gummi bears count as 1 drink?
true friends will drive 3 hours to come smoke a couple blunts with you on the bridge where your car broke down
Had the longest conversation today with a potentially homeless cuban woman about mind control.
I'm sorry I pissed in your bedroom and then woke you up when I tried to jump off the balcony
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
Like, I just want a guy who will drop what he's doing to come touch my vagina whenever I want and to leave me the hell alone whenever I want. Is that SO MUCH TO ASK??
Randomize
