I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
Three things I need a picture of: your friend, your bong, and your dick.
Tipped our cab with a photo booth pic of us, a paper dollar, a dollar in quarters, a crest white strip. And a tanning pass valid in boston
Just found a g string in our driveway, wtf happened this weekend?
How many people can say they've shit on the floor of a five star hotel?
We exchanged snapchat usernames instead of numbers. Is that what America has come to?
after you got high, you started to make guac with your bare hands and said: "there's soda bubbles in my legs"
Now in listening to Jerome Bettis speak at the hall of fame and my boner just started twirling a terrible towel
I refuse to be socially acceptable any longer than what is needed to pick up chinese food.
Who is this? I have a text from you last night telling me your name and to train hard for Tuesday, please make this make sense
You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
was having sex but got distracted... he instragramed a pic of his crotch
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP 😂😂😂😂
Randomize
