Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
Drunk. I slept-stripped.
By myself.
Now have a vodka water and get your shit together
She just threw the soap bottle at me from the ladie's room and keeps asking me when we left the bar and got on the boat.
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
Come make me food. I feel like if I go in the kitchen I will just get Gin.. and pass out in there.
I have to stop letting him stay all weekend. I feel like a cored apple.
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
I got so many dick pics last night. It was like a slideshow from heaven.
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
Is it appropriate to send an apology gift to his roommates for breaking the bathroom sink during crazy sex?
When's the best time to point out that all of my orgasms this year have been self-administered? Valentine's day?
She said she hasn't cheated on me in 7 and a half days and she'd like praise for that.
I was watchin a porno and I sware I saw that dude at the bar at applebees the other night
Randomize
