I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
My mom just called and reminded me not to throw up in any cabs tonight. Happy St. Patty's Day.
I saw a girl walking around campus with bandages on both her knees. I need to get her number.
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
I woke up to my dog puking on my bed. Looks like it was a successful night for us all.
We were having an argument with his friends mom about whether it was worse that he bootycalled me at 4 a.m. or that I bootycalled him at 12 in the afternoon
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
If there was a build-a-penis, I would build that penis.
Well, he hasn't actually seen me naked. Just my boobs... and the left side of my vagina.
Pennsylvania now holds the distinct honor of being the third state I've crapped my pants in.
I woke up in my neighbors backyard with glitter on my teeth and sparklers super glued on my bra. which part was your fault?
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
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