Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(419): View more from Ohio

watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced

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(905): View more from Toronto

I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.

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(314): View more from Missouri

I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.

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(206): View more from Washington

Saturday dinner is funfetti cake and merlot. Singlehood has come to this.

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(646): View more from New York

I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.

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(289): View more from Ontario

Dude, I brought the fucking tequila to that party and they cheered for the chick that seriously only brought limes.

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(856): View more from New Jersey

and than he said 'I did amateur porn for a while' and I just knew tinder did not fail me this time

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(248): View more from Michigan

I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??

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(405): View more from Oklahoma

I feel like he doesn't realize we're offering him a threeway with sisters and I don't understand how that's possible.

(1-405): View more from Oklahoma

Maybe we should bring mom next time.

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