All I have in my fridge is chocolate cake, pizza, spicy mayo sauce, beer, and weed. I love college
The paper boy just woke me up in the front yard again.
FOR A FUCKING 40?! A FUCKING 40?! YOU GAVE THE CAT AWAY FOR BEER?!
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
So basically i got outta bed and started peeing on the a/c unit..when my roommate tried to stop me i looked at him and said "i got this"
When I came home you were using a glowstick to eat peanut butter from the jar.
I think I sprained my soul last night
We kept trying to bring you to the hospital but you had a tantrum and kept saying you would never be Miss America
At least I'm doing lines with a notecard. That counts for something right
NO SHITSVILLE I just saw a homeless dude punch a pigeon that flew by him
I was in the bathroom and I heard a phone ding inside one of the stalls. I really wanted to say, nature is calling, but I was still in my work uniform
I've made this amazing blanket/pillow cocoon combo and I am set for life in here.
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
I'm not sure. I have to find the Greeks I was with last night and see if they can explain to me why I can't hear out of my right ear and why I look like I got the shit kicked out of me
all my friends are getting married and here i am in a committed relationship with rum
Randomize
