no, he came in my armpit
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
you don't know how close you are to someone till they ask you to shave their ass.
For the amount I put out, I should be going on way more dates.
His housemate was playing a sad violin solo for me on my way out. God I hate musicians.
The best thing about my promotion is that I now have an office with a door. I can take my naps in peace instead of leaning my head against the stall in the bathroom.
I can't believe they pay you six figures. I hate you.
Seriously? He's going to use MY birthday sex as the opportunity to ask if he can pee on me?!? I let him, but wow talk about selfish.
I realized I was totally the dude in that hook up. I came first and didn't wanna help him finish. And he had paisley sheets.
I just made SCOTCHSICLES. no further info is necessary
We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
Well. I guess talking about me stealing your wife may not be in the list of legit conversations
There is a direct correlation between gooch size and male fertility. Science.
Sent him a snap chat of him eating me out so he can relive the moment.
It's my birthday weekend! I'm getting a Brazilian and he's going to fucking Arkansas. Where the fuck are his priorities?
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
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