the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
A few things for you to consider: 1. Drunk enough that I'm looking up the dictionary definition of Wish. 2. Dictionary.com has new features. 3. Windows is offering me 500 business cards for 5 bucks. 4. I've always wanted a card that says I'm a ninja
My alcohol tolerance is way too high for this paycheck.
I suppose drinking a cosmo at lunch alone can't look good but I mean... sometimes it's just necessary
We lost track of him for only 10 min and he gets kicked out for sneaking into the kitchen and trying to operate the deep fryer.
No I'm done finals, but I'm not coming home until these hickeys are gone.
I have a gash on my leg an a lobster leg in my purse.
At least you got some premium homework time. Still drinking vodka from a coffee cup?
I switched to water. When the numbers get blurry you are no longer being productive.
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
So topless strobe light beer pong turned into me rugby tackling a bitch to the ground.my tits will never forgive me for sacrificing their majesticness for responsibility
We poured some Korbel out for our homie Dick Clark.
I was a plus one at an intervention for a person I didn't know.
I may have had several rum punches and then gone to the store and used European cucumbers to prove my baton twirling prowess.
Not sure what happened last night, but I woke up without a shirt on and cereal glued to my boobs...
No biggie, just trying to keep my liver function in the green
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