You told me to hold on because you had to barf like a dinosaur.
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
I was just handed a mimosa the size of my head. Stay tuned.
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
I feel if a girl leaves my house the next morning feeling degraded and in desparate need of a shower, then I have succeeded.
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
not to be a dick but do you remember the names of all your friends i made out with after we broke up?
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
Woke up, moved an empty handle of fireball to spit blood, then put the morning cigarette out in it.
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
Just woke up from an extremely erotic dream featuring Steve Buscemi. Now I can't sleep.
He's honking my boob in his sleep
It's innocent and endearing in some way
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