It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
Just got a lecture from Dad about how I need to be more responsible and start buying my weed in larger quantities so that i can save money. Like he was serious and kind of disappointed in me for not adapting to his method earlier.
Escorted a stripper to her car last night,and all I got was a "Thanks" and "Go Steelers."
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
Nah I'm perfectly content solely banging the married bartender once a week.
That's practically a relationship for you
My boss just told me not to come back to work if I decide to drink. Challenge accepted.
And we're now at 8 people from the office coming to my desk to ask me "do you feel better?".
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
I have a bunch of bug bites on my ass... This is why you don't have sex against a tree in the woods
Does your balding hurt less when a 19 year old holds your hand?
You can now call me Rabbi, and I can now perform weddings, funerals, and other services in all fifty states. You're welcome, world.
APPARENTLY I MISSED SOMEONE SWALLOWING A WHOLE BAG OF METH WHILE I WAS ON BREAK.
Randomize
