I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
So I cleaned the toilet last night at 2 am and woke up with pink eye. Never doing that again.
Matt is in the hospital again. the night nurse text me asking not to bring the boombox again. is it sad or awesome that they are starting to know us?
I can hear her blowing you man. All I hear is her saying 'yeah' over and over again.
come parachute off the vicodin airplane with meee
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
Definitely want to eloquently cunt punt those bitches thru the field goals of life.
It was my little brother's 14th birthday today. Didn't know what to get him so I just showed him how to use incognito tabs on google chrome.
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
He showed up to a baby shower and kept telling everyone he was late because he was pregaming. And then tried honking the pregnant girls tits
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
so at 3am I stumbled into my parents house and crawled into bed with them, I need to start dating.
OHMYGOD YOU REALLY THINK I'D BE ON OPRAH?!
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