i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
You have to understand, this is the first time I'm looking at a whopper sober.
Half my make-up was stuck to his thigh where I'd fallen asleep after the blowjob.
In a cab. Towels everywhere. Confused.
The Angel on my shoulder is now resorting to merely reminding me that, "You will regret this later." I'm not sure if he's learning how I think or just giving up. Either way, should make life a bit more interesting.
Between my sister puke and rallying at the bar and my brother sending a drunk passed out naked pic in which his dick was exposed, I don't know which sibling to be more proud of this weekend.
So when I eventually, if ever, find someone I'd like to marry, do you think having people fly to africa for a lion king themed wedding is too much?
When you and that girl went into the bedroom, you yelled "FOR NARNIA!"
The site I use to study flash cards keeps showing ads for truck companies hiring drivers. It's like the site is saying "hey, we all know there's no hope for you, just give up and Become a truck driver."
Looked like a bag of smashed assholes and smelt like a brewery - still got morning sex. Marriage rules sometimes!
Figured out why that fly won't leave. It keeps buzzing through my weed smoke
Fly high, Fly.
Probably for the best. My morning wood is pretty horrible. I wouldn't want to tip the earth's axis/ create a new magnetic pole
you told me I was being patronizing because I didn't want you to run barefoot across a construction site
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
Randomize
