we have pet lesbian snakes
please dont ever try to drink horizontally again. I thought I was going to have to give you cpr
Right now I can't do anything that will ban me from donating plasma. That is a legit source of income for me.
They high fived over us while we gave them synchronized blowjobs. In the same bed. Under the same blanket.
Boy did I ever crash and burn on the pickled egg pick up line.
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
THE CEO RESPONDED TO THE MEMO WITH HIS "UNICORN" EMAIL ADDRESS AND NOW HE'S APOLOGIZING TO EVERYONE FOR USING HIS PERSONAL EMAIL AT WORK.
If she "comes out" to me I guess I'll high five her. That's pretty much my response to everything these days.
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
That awkward moment when you hear your boss yelling during sex while you're on her couch eating Easy Mac.
Its just akward. Everytime he tells me he loves me, I have to respond with, I love having sex with you. and he just stares at me in amazement
Dude, you screamed I AM THE WALRUS while giving a statue of Ronald McCdonald a lapdance. You were NOT sober.
You’ve seen my tits of course he broke his wedding vows
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
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