talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
never have phone sex with a hardcore republican during this health care crisis . just dont.
He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
Why is there an empty beer bottle in the shower?
Why wouldn't there be.
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
You're the only person I know who would be upset about making out with a girl you like. You're like a drunken Charlie Brown.
Considering that your "hello" was replaced with "Fuck yo couch," I'm not surprised that you have a black eye.
Han Solo would be ashamed of me.
well you don't shave your pubes into a handlebar mustache and keep the party to yourself
I can't wash the smell of tacos off my hands. I feel like the Lady Macbeth of Chipotle.
Oh goddamn. That a super downer Tuesday reality right there. Just hit me with the cold, hard, nasty facts.
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?
Little does she know that you've out-sourced your conscience to a girl who doesn't even wear pants on a regular basis
i don't know what happened one minute im stumbling home drunk and the next im drinking pabst and smoking with a french guy ive never met named hugo.
you ate an entire watermelon by using a CD as a spoon, then proceeded to chuck the leftovers at some dudes car...
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