I woke up naked by my window. blinds open. smiley face drawn on my window.
I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
I know we didn't hook up because i was still wearing my fanny pack in the morning
I don't know what you're doing, but there's a dragon on my street.
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
Blacked out at the beach and unblacked out at a piano bar singing Tiny Dancer.
So a sorority girl just introduced herself to me by saying "a guy I used to fuck just threw up on me" and then she grinded on me
Two people confessed their love to me last night. Drunk is a good color on me
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
YOU ARE SO GOD DAMN LOUD AND YOU'RE SHAKING THE GOD DAMN HOUSE. FUCKING STOP.
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
Santa tracker drinking game, you in or what?
Randomize
