someone just laughed at me while i'm laying on the floor waiting for the bus. like they've never been hungover.
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
I want to do something romantic. Like gargle champagne before I put your dick in my mouth.
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
The window painters skipped us. They didn't know what to do with the giant SMOKE WEED in the window. So they just skipped it.
I spent two entire hours explaining to a guy why I wouldn't make out with him. How was your night?
After the day I've had, I can't decide if donuts or fireball would be the appropriate priority.
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
He wants me to fart in his mouth and is offering me SOOOO much coke. I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. GIVE ME ADVICE.
I'm not going out, it's sweat pants and gallon vodka night at my place and I'm the only one on the guest list.
This is because you lost at fooseball isn't it?
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
MY GUT IS TELLING ME YES AND SO IS MY VAGINA
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
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