Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
then he compared my vagina to a dishwasher. A DISHWASHER?!
Article 1, law 1, section 1 of the apartment 25 party handbook: tarp will be purchased prior to any and all future parties. Aforementioned tarp will be placed on floor. Any and all sick patrons must relocate to tarp preceding the event of expulsion of bodily fluids. Failure to do so will result in ejection of guilty patron and banishment of the accused from succeeding party. All patrons must read and sign a copy before entry is granted.
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
to have them in my mouth would be like meeting a unicorn while floating on a cloud of glitter
Yeah to go race car driving with a 54 yr old gastroenterologist. I really wish you'd come to have that drink with me Wednesday
If I wear a tail on Halloween, how am I supposed to grind? Maybe I will just wear devil horns
I think snapchat is trying to tell you something. It's saying your boobs were meant to be seen by his family.
Actually, I may scrap this entire plan. I just realized that I had sex with a guy with his own whiskey commercial.
TYLER OWES ME SO MUCH
I LET A CREEPY MAN I DONT KNOW SUCK ON MY NIPPLES
All I want is dick and wine.
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
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