How come twittering sounds sexual?
Because of Bambi.
Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
His bookmark is a piece of toilet paper. No shame there.
I'll be heading downtown with donuts and a lawn chair at 9am to go Halloween Walk o' Shame spotting.
Despite what happened tonight, Im still expecting Jesus birthday sex
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
But theres a keg here and me gusta
He just sent me a picture of himself naked while cooking pancakes and he made the caption "bitchin' in the kitchen"
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
Doug will be the one to get my vagina. I don't know when or how but I'm now declaring that it is his. And he better not disappoint.
I called you a cum goblin in my voicemail. I stand by it.
I tired using vodka to remove my makeup
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
Randomize
