WTF. you left me with no condoms and you ate all my mac and cheese. scumbag.
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
Whatever, she only has 293 friends, she cant afford to be defriending me..
Whoever decided putting Tom Seizmore and Heidi Fleiss together in rehab should win some kind of award.
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
It would be been irresponsible not to make cleaning the apartment into a drinking game
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
I vaguely remember taking a shit behind the shed before I started puking over the fence. No more Xanax.
I want to break up with him.....but he has a george forman grill...like I need that
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
I don't remember anything past "we have 15 minutes to drink this keg."
HELP! How do I get paint off the dog?
Dude, they hit that lizard part of my brain that tells me to fuck people.
Preach sister.
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
He’s definitely circumcised. There’s not enough room in those speedos for a foreskin with that fire hose he’s packing.
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