well i just puked at a family gathering so i can cross that off the bucket list
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
Just bought myself a coach diaper bag. I thought it would be perfect for school. the baby bottle holders are where i'm gonna put my booze
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
I can't tell which way is up. Too many corners around his house too. An arbitary assimilation of edges.
Christ, I swear you are the high man's Dr. Seuss.
The police woke me up so they had no choice but to see my morning wood.
Haha...we lost by one cup to a guy w shitty facial hair. What makes me most mad abt the loss is that I could grow a better beard on my vag.
there's a guy in the del taco parking lot doing pushups. let's be his friends
Unfortunately hes not a hipster douchebag with no life goals, so naturally I'm not interested.
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
STONER SAFETY TIP: don't use the driver's side vanity mirror to check how red your eyes are while you're driving. it won't work. trust me.
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
He told me to leave him behind and bury him in his batman pajamas. So two lessons I guess, don't give Tom whiskey and don't touch his daddy issues with a twenty nine and a half foot pole.
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