i'm at a stripclub and this bitch just lit her nipples on fire!
gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
Somehow I don't trust you in this state to talk to you about a colonoscopy
Announcement: Given the sad circumstances regarding the death of my dearest friend Chong the Bong, there will be a brief memorial service for him tomorrow evening at 10:30 at my place. After sharing some memories and sending his spirit off to the great bowl in the sky, we will all take place in the commemoration and maiden voyage of his son, Chong Squared, who eagerly waits to meet all of you. High blessings to you all, piece be with you.
I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
It's nights like those I refer to my life motto: You can't be just friends with someone after you've seen their genitals.
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
I just windexed my mirror headboard, Lets get to work.
He didn't call me beautiful but he came in less than five minutes so same thing, right?
My grandpa is driving me to get condoms and wine. This is adulthood.
We were fucking in the back of my truck and no joke a skunk came up and sprayed us. How am I supposed to explain this to my parents
dude i told her that I loved her...and she said, " go fuck yourself"
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