Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
No talking tonight. Just drinking and puking up memories
Some days you just pee in a stairwell and go home.
"He was so not worth staining my backseat for."
In unrelated news guys should not ask what I'm doing/wearing if they can't handle an honest answer. I'm not pretending I'm not sitting on the couch in yoga pants watching Community so you can beat off.
I want to tell you your future: you're going to be having sex
You know it's been a rough week when you funnel beers by yourself.
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag
What part of “the stripper has a gun, we need to leave” is confusing you? She’s drunk, she’s fucking crazy and NOW SHE’S PACKING HEAT!
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize
