My phone now changes "me" to "mrrrrrrrrh", thank you new years.
this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
she has an amazing ass but I need more beers to get past her horse face. It works out perfect becauseI can use her teeth as a bottle opener.
Yes, that was ME getting carried out of the club singing 'i believe i can fly'
I want to name my colorful bowl Batman. Why? I still have yet to figure it out. But I'm calling it Batman.
They gave me patron and potatoes I couldn't say no
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
At least life still wants to fuck me.
can we drink soon
I'm not sure who this is but I'm free tomorrow night
Noo not in a booty call way, in a 'How are your abs and penis doing today?' sort of way.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
This toilet bowl is my home.
Blunts beyotch
What? Joints? Blunts?
I'll refer you to my previous text: "Blunts beyotch"
Saw a sign that said the chorus of never gonna give you up was enough time to wash your hands. Coronavirus has Rick rolled me.
Randomize
