grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
One night stand!! Now I'm pissing excellence
That burning is chlamydia
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
I just woke up and shes still asleep next to me with her vibrator inside her and on. Whats normal protocol for this situation?
21st Birthday Idea: liquor store gift registry. Give me a promotion.
She looks like if Peter Griffin was a lesbian.
Run away.
We passed my parents while I was giving him road head...that awkward
If I come in tomorrow with a cane and a seeing eye dog it's because I just mixed up my salicylic acid acne stuff with my eye makeup remover
He also ordered me a vibrator last week, so the flowers kind of balance it out
So I think my motto should be "losing bras and dignity every weekend" but like in a really amazing way
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
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