Also my back is semi rug burned and I'm holding you fully responsible.
I would love to give you more rug burn
we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
I least I know I can't get pregnant because it's on my hair
Why do I always give away anal sex as birthday presents?
Shut up... one mans birthday cake is another mans sodomy my friend
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
i always knew that i'd have sex in your room, i just assumed it would be with you
I mean, once you help another girl drunker than you zip her jeans you can't help but be friends after that
we've decided whoever is stupid enough to use the condom that's tacked to the wall deserves to get pregnant.
I swear she lies about being allergic to gluten so she'll get all the jack and not have to drink shitty beer like the rest of us
Hiding the dark circles under my eyes this morning was like trying to hide a Beached Whale on the Couch eating Pita chips.
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
Do it!! We better have a duck by the time I get home.
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
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