I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
You were running around the house covered in syrup, with shredded down pillow feathers on your body screaming "AFLACK!" at everyone
He picked me up for our 1st date and saw my roommate crying on the floor Fabreesing her vagina...
I WALKED myself out of breath. And I'm lost I'm a Tim Hortons parking lot. That's how hungover I am.
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
She insisted on cleaning her room in the dark. 5 minutes in, she forgot what she was doing and started putting shirts on instead of hanging them up.
Do you know how hard it is to was the scent of sex from your hair in a gas station bathroom?!
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
I'm at the point in my life where I'm gonna sell my eggs for cash
The three of us were sitting silently in my dining room at 4:30 am, half drunk, eating cold spaghetti and listining to death metal. I need a fucking cigarette.
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
I asked him if we were exclusive and he followed up with, "If a tree falls in the woods and no ones around, does it still make a sound?" Wtf am I supposed to do with that?!
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