i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
Dude I think you forgot how to talk last night. We kept asking if you wanted a condom and you just smiled and made weird noises...
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
totally poinked my lawyers daughter in his hot tub last night. i figure getting off is just compensation for not getting me off.
I just found your spare underwear and the half eaten granola bar you left in my purse.
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
I took his sheets with my when I left seeing that I underestimated my period. Also grabbed a 6-pack out of the fridge because breakfast is the most important meal of the day & I don't do other peoples laundry for free.
I'm really stoned in my underwear. I probably won't make it to the bar.
She needs sedatives and a leash
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
I suppose we should both be prepared for the secret service to come visit us after this conversation. Hi NSA.
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
Randomize
