just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
I'm drinking while I write this paper. When I can't see the screen anymore I'm gonna come out
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
Yeah, my mom walked in on us. Instead of yelling, she went and hid in the bathroom til we finished. It was pretty classy.
used foursquare to find where i am. please come get me. this is the scariest bedroom ever.
i realized really quickly that drinking a bottle of vodka and 3 crystal light packets wasn't the best idea i've ever had
No one figured out why I brought along the vibrating massager.
Can I sell my birth control in a yard sale?
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
I kept falling all over the place and yelled at the bouncer you can't kick me out I'm from Texas.
Should I rub the neighbors amazon package in the dog shit they left on the front steps?
Randomize
