It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
For some reason I knew you were going to smell like strippers and burritos when I hugged you.
Just woke up next to our cab driver from last night. Please tell me this isn't happening.
Kate gave me a 3 day old cup of tequila last night and forced me to chug it. P.s. i drew u a picture
its friday night, im aone in my apartment and eating 2 year expired canned fruit, naked. i'm not single or anything..
Maybe shotgunning 4 days after oral surgery wasn't such a good idea after all...
She literally just cut half her hair off because she's tired of asking someone to hold it back when shes drunk and puking.
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
He made me put my cow print vest and my cowboy hat from my ' sheriff woody' costume and said I'll show you a woody. What I charmer huh!? I love make up sex
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
I saw a drunk guy run across the street with an American flag between his buttcheeks.
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
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