So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
First night in the new apartment. There are 12 people here i don't know, Tequila, and a crying girl locked in our bathroom. I think the apartment christening is complete.
Vodka @ 9pm. Library. Nothing can go wrong, I promise.
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
I feel like his dick looks like a decorative autumn squash.
Just saw a woman in bootie shorts and a winter coat at the library. God. Bless. Prostitutes.
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
i mean i'm drinking free wine with lesbians and listening to sinead oconnor so i'm not sure who won that breakup
I mean, except for the part where I was vomiting up pineapple and hot sauce, it was a really fun time.
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
I'm eating pizza in the bathtub
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
"Why is there a bottle of Tequila taped to the fan?"
Randomize
