Judging by the grocery store, everyone stocked up on frozen pizza and beer for the blizzard. If our generation ever faces doomsday, we'll go out smiling.
so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
I was relieved after I found the unopened condom in my pocket. Then I found the open one in the other pocket..
He looked at me and said "Last call" before putting his penis away into his boxers
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
Ya these assholes wanted to like sit around and eat cupcakes and watch the notebook. I was like fuck you, I want to go make some people uncomfortable in public.
She told me about it right after. She said she was scared I would be disappointed. And I was, but I pretended not to be. Which pretty much sums up our relationship.
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
We can put you in charge of something
I can be in charge of being more wasted than anyone there so everyone feels comfortable being ridiculous
That Kevin guy is something else...His penis is fucking glorious. And he has a way with words. If he lived here I'd be the conductor of the fuck caboose. I mean literally I would never want to get off that thing.
Let's be honest dude, you almost cried when I gave you a handy, you are not ready for a relationship, I knew this.
The dick lei will go down in squad history
I woke up with a twisted ankle and was covered in lube. Not entirely sure what happened last night
I just had mom give me advice about how and where to store my lube in my shower. It was super awkward. Of course, she also walked in on me masturbating once so I guess turnabout is fair play
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
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