Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
I think my goal in life now is to be a Trending topic on Twitter after I die.
Just got a birthday card from Camel. How am I supposed to stop smoking when they care?
I just threw up in a patch of wild flowers on the side of the road. I never knew rock bottom was so beautiful.
My right boob is officially about a handful while my left is 1 and 3/4 handfuls. I'm staring at the mirror falling into a deep depression.
Either he was jacking off or having a seizure next to me in bed. Either way, I was too lazy to help.
after we had sex he told me his original plan was to have sex with my roommate but his buddy likes her so i was backup
After he came all he could say was how great the lighting fixtures where in my apartment.
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
Just spent the equivalent of my life savings in the liquor store. This is going to be a good weekend
i dont know how he's 22 and thinks emoticons will get him laid. lady boner just died.
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
The fact that we all screamed by Felicia to a bitch actually named Felicia will be a highlight of my life
Yo. What's your name again? You put "don't tell your landlord" as your name lol
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