perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
I told a kindergarten student that candy canes are bones of reject elves.
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
I went out in a blaze of glory. I failed the field sobriety test by saying ABCD FUCK YOU.
winnie the pooh came out of nowhere and offered me a burrito...it was a fucking amazing burrito.
Well, I found the missing blow... in my fucking suitcase... THIS MORNING. Yeah, I flew from FL to NY with blow in my suitcase yesterday.
I told you to check, dude
Yeah, AFTER I checked my bag and I was already sitting on a plane. Oh well. I figured worst case I'd do like 15 hours in county and I was totally prepared for that anyways. I always prepare for that when we hang out.
I passed out in all my clothes. like my purse too..and with a cup of water next to me..and my last tweet last night was "Bye."
I love you. We're gonna celebrate your 21st by putting people in duct tape bikinis and pushing them down tequila slip and slides
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
In the last 3 weeks my drunken adventures have caused me to lose 2 credit cards, one debit card, a bracelet, two purses, and my $500 phone... Maybe i should quit drinking.
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