nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
happy early fathers day!!!
im not a father
about that...
I have a drunk 6th sense to lyrics of songs i dont know. It only works when i dance..
Friend I haven't seen in almost a year just IMed me to let me know that my mom stuck her boob out the window on the freeway at her.
Her mom responded by mooning my mother. I really don't know what's worse.
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
I will not remember tonight for the most part. This text will be evidence. You can and probably will use this against me.
Man...I want to get monumentally fucked tonight.
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
I'm the catering manager, it's not my job to stop 2 teenagers from fucking in the bathroom. I couldn't bring myself to stop that sort of young romance anyway, that's what I pay you people for
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
I went to steal condoms from your room and all I could find was chik fil a sauce
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
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