she's like the human form of herpes, as soon as you think she's gone for good you have another out break.
Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
True life I used my fake as a photo id for my final. My professor told me good luck and laughed. Hope the bouncers are in the St. Patrick's day spirit.
You insisted on drinking champagne out of the dog bowl
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
Did I mention I hooked up with another country star? I think I need some sort of trophy for each time, yah know? Or like a sash and I win a badge or patch for each person. Like a slutty Girl Scout.
There's a whistle here and I just want to play my whistle song on it.
I flashed my cleaning lady and don't remember who I went on a date with. I know who I woke up with though, that counts right?
I just sustained a forearm injury dancing to salt n peppa in my kitchen. Fack. I pushed it real good.
Would I be crazy if I drove 1,000 miles for some dick? What mile does it become ridiculous?
Sooooooo this guy just asked me if I'd be interested in a threesome... I'm considering bc I would get to hang out with his dog afterwards.
Like people might wonder why I put up with your puns. You give good head and play with my hair
I love waking up to reeses ice cream. But I DONT love waking up to it all over my cat. I blame you.
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
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